SAVING THE BEST FOR LAST

At the start of 2009, I decided to write on my blog every month, either a story, musing, articles, thoughts whatever, but with one condition that they should all be written by me– either what I had already written but never had the inclination to display it anywhere OR ones that were inspired on the spur of the moment (like the one on walking). Winning the first prize for my essay on my mother (Read it. it's titled "Who is she" elsewhere in the blog), spurred me on to write more.

I am glad that I have stuck to my resolution and diligently posted a write up without fail month after month. It has been a real pleasure to look forward to every month. Looking back, it has been a good year and I have done a lot of things that was stagnating for sometime. Writing was one on that list that I kept putting off. Going ahead, I won’t stop blogging. It may just mean not writing every single month. But write I will.
For as the quotes go, “We write to taste life twice, in the moment and in retrospection” - Anais Nin AND “For me, writing is exploration; and most of the time, I'm surprised where the journey takes me. “ Jack Dann.
I am going to break one rule this last month of the year (December) and post two mails that have really inspired me many times over, ones I never get tired of reading, ones I revisit when I feel I need explanations especially when things get complicated with life and people, ones that I draw strength from time and again. I felt that it is only right to post them here to mark an end to 2009. To all those reading this, hope you enjoy it as much as I do.

PART 1:


SEASON, REASON OR LIFETIME – EITHER COPY AND PASTE THE LINK AND READ IT WITH THE GREAT VISUALS AND BEAUTIFUL MUSIC IN THE BACK GROUND OR JUST READ IT HERE
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bLltt5cPDOc&feature=related
People come into your life for a reason, a season, or a lifetime. When you figure out which it is, you know exactly what to do.
When someone is in your life for a REASON, it is usually to meet a need you have expressed outwardly or inwardly. They have come to assist you through a difficulty, to provide you with guidance and support, to aid you physically, emotionally, or spiritually. They may seem like a godsend, and they are. They are there for the reason you need them to be. Then, without any wrong doing on your part or at an inconvenient time, this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end. Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away. Sometimes they act up or out and force you to take a stand. What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled; their work is done. The prayer you sent up has been answered and it is now time to move on.
When people come into your life for a SEASON, it is because your turn has come to share, grow, or learn. They may bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh. They may teach you something you have never done. They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy. Believe it! It is real! But, only for a season.
LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons; those things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation. Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person/people (anyway); and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life.

PART TWO: TAKING A FRESH LOOK AT YOURSELF


The second one is a bit long, but worth reading. I totally loved every word of this and I hope I am getting there…..

There comes a time in your life.....
There comes a time in your life when you finally get it…when, in the midst of all your fears and insanity, you stop dead in your tracks and somewhere the voice inside your head cries out…ENOUGH! Enough fighting and crying, blaming and struggling to hold on. Then, like a child quieting down after a tantrum, you blink back your tears and begin to look at the world through new eyes.

You realize it’s time to stop hoping and waiting for something to change, or for happiness, safety and security to magically appear over the next horizon.

You realize that in the real world there aren’t always fairy tale endings, and that any guarantee of “happily ever after” must begin with you…and in the process a sense of serenity is born of acceptance.

You awaken to the fact that you are not perfect and that not everyone will always love, appreciate or approve of who or what you are…and that’s OK. They are entitled to their own views and opinions.

You learn the importance of loving and championing yourself…and in the process a sense of new found confidence is born of self-approval.

Your stop complaining and blaming other people for the things they did to you – or didn’t do for you – and you learn that the only thing you can really count on is the unexpected.

You learn that people don’t always say what they mean or mean what they say and that not everyone will always be there for you and everything isn’t always about you.

So, you learn to stand on your own and to take care of yourself…and in the process a sense of safety and security is born of self-reliance.

You stop judging and pointing fingers and you begin to accept people as they are and to overlook their shortcomings and human frailties…and in the process a sense of peace and contentment is born of forgiveness.

You learn to open up to new worlds and different points of view. You begin reassessing and redefining who you are and what you really stand for.

You learn the difference between wanting and needing and you begin to discard the doctrines and values you’ve outgrown, or should never have bought into to begin with.

You learn that there is power and glory in creating and contributing and you stop maneuvering through life merely as a “consumer” looking for your next fix.

You learn that principles such as honesty and integrity are not the outdated ideals of a bygone era, but the mortar that holds together the foundation upon which you must build a life.

You learn that you don’t know everything, it’s not your job to save the world and that you can’t teach a pig to sing. You learn the only cross to bear is the one you choose to carry.

Then you learn about love. You learn to look at relationships as they really are and not as you would have them be. You learn that alone does not mean lonely.

You stop trying to control people, situations and outcomes. You learn to distinguish between guilt and responsibility and the importance of setting boundaries and learning to say NO.

You also stop working so hard at putting your feelings aside, smoothing things over and ignoring your needs.

You learn that your body really is your temple. You begin to care for it and treat it with respect. You begin to eat a balanced diet, drinking more water, and take more time to exercise.

You learn that being tired fuels doubt, fear, and uncertainty and so you take more time to rest. And, just food fuels the body, laughter fuels our soul. So you take more time to laugh and to play.

You learn that, for the most part, you get in life what you deserve, and that much of life truly is a self-fulfilling prophecy.

You learn that anything worth achieving is worth working for and that wishing for something to happen is different than working toward making it happen.

More importantly, you learn that in order to achieve success you need direction, discipline and perseverance. You learn that no one can do it all alone, and that it’s OK to risk asking for help.

You learn the only thing you must truly fear is fear itself. You learn to step right into and through your fears because you know that whatever happens you can handle it and to give in to fear is to give away the right to live life on your own terms.

You learn to fight for your life and not to squander it living under a cloud of impending doom.

You learn that life isn’t always fair, you don’t always get what you think you deserve and that sometimes bad things happen to unsuspecting, good people…and you learn not to always take it personally.

You learn that nobody’s punishing you and everything isn’t always somebody’s fault. It’s just life happening. You learn to admit when you are wrong and to build bridges instead of walls.

You learn that negative feelings such as anger, envy and resentment must be understood and redirected or they will suffocate the life out of you and poison the universe that surrounds you.

You learn to be thankful and to take comfort in many of the simple things we take for granted, things that millions of people upon the earth can only dream about: a full refrigerator, clean running water, a soft warm bed, a long hot shower.

Then, you begin to take responsibility for yourself by yourself and you make yourself a promise to never betray yourself and to never, ever settle for less than you heart’s desire.

You make it a point to keep smiling, to keep trusting, and to stay open to every wonderful possibility.

You hang a wind chime outside your window so you can listen to the wind.

Finally, with courage in you heart, you take a stand, you take a deep breath, and you begin to design the life you want to live as best as you can.

What a gift!
Author Unknown.

APPU & BILLI - A TV SCRIPT

I was given the assignment once to write a TV script, for 10-12 year old kids and the topic was “The merits of keeping physically fit for children.” Given that I haven’t watched TV for over a decade, I didn’t have a clue as to how to proceed. What the trends are, what may appeal to kids, sequencing of a script, how to get a message across without sounding preachy… Nor do I know much about exercise. So here goes, my first effort at writing a script ever. By the end of it, I could actually visualize myself watching this in an animated version, in any language. I quite liked the ending after all the gyan that Billi gives.

APPU & BILLI.

Scene 1 shows a little boy sleeping on a bed.

(Excited high pitched voice) Wake up! Wake up! It’s time for a walk.

Appu opened his eyes, rubs them and looked sleepily around his room, a rather messy room at that. Appu is a plump, lazy 10 year old and Billi is his dog, a brown mongrel with a melting eyes and a tail that wouldn’t stop wagging.

Appu: Who’s that? Who spoke (He looks around and could not see anyone except Billi, his dog, near his bed).

Billi (Appu’s dog speaking in a high “dog voice”): It’s me, Billi, your dog speaking. What an awful name you’ve chosen for me. Don’t you know cats and dogs have been enemies for ages?

Appu (thinking aloud in a surprised voice): I’ve had Billi since I was a pup, but this is the first time he’s spoken to me and demanding a walk too. I must be dreaming.

Billi (in an impatient tone): Well! What made you give me a cat’s name?

Appu: (slowly getting used to this crazy situation and answers in a lazy voice): umm... I was too lazy to think of a proper, appropriate “doggie” name for you.

Billi: That’s the problem with you. You’ve always been too lazy for words. It’s time to change all that.

Appu: But I like being lazy. I like sleeping and simply lying still. What is wrong with that?

Billi: Shame on you! A young child like you! Nothing wrong with sleeping and eating well, but one must also exercise to keep fit.

Appu (in a horrified tone): EXERCISE? ME? I have never done it and I am not sure I want to start now.

Billi: Like I said, it’s time to change all that. Go on! Get dressed and let’s go to the park opposite your house and I’ll show you how to have a good time.

Appu (in a reluctant tone): Okay.

(Appu gets dressed, grumbling all the way, moving sluggishly with Billi romping around him and encouraging him to hurry up. )

Scene 2 – Park Scene.

They walk out of the house and reach the park.

Billi: Now let’s both run from one end of the park to another.

Appu (sarcastically): Whatever you say, my lord!

(Appu and Billi start to run. The cool, green grass beneath their feet, the wind blowing in their faces. They stop when they reach the end of the park).

Billi: How do you feel now?

Appu (panting): My heart is beating so fast.

Billi: Good! You got the blood pumping. Regular activity and exercise make for a healthier heart. A healthy heart is a strong heart that works efficiently and is able to easily supply the body with blood. (This piece of information is accompanied by animated visuals with Billi’s voice in the background).

Appu: I could do with that. I get tired so easily.

(Appu and Billi run around the park again, more slowly this time. Appu take off his shoes to feel the grass beneath his feet and runs bare feet).

Appu: Looks like I can do this better as it goes along.

Billi: Endurance or stamina refers to a person’s ability to continue doing a strenuous activity for extended periods of time, meaning a person with good stamina can bike, jog, play or run for a long time without getting tired easily. This comes from regular physical activity. The body also gets a boost from exercise that helps it to fight colds and diseases. (This is explained with animated visuals supporting the sentences in Billi’s voice).

Billi: Now. Let’s both roll over on the grass and then you can try and catch me.

(Appu and Billi do roll over and over on the grass. Then they both play “run and tag”. This continues for a while with peppy music in the background.)

Appu (laughing): This is so much fun! I never knew I could enjoy myself so much.

(Appu’s skin is no longer dull. It is glowing. He is able to breathe easy and no longer moving slowly and sluggishly).

Billi: Do you know, Individuals who are physically active on a regular basis don’t get sick as much as those who are inactive? Physical activity not only builds muscles, it builds stronger bones too, which in turn goes hand in hand with healthy joints. As the body builds muscles, it tends to lose fat which results in a leaner, healthier body. (Again, all this is accompanied by visuals in Billi’s voice in the background).

Appu: I definitely feel good. I am no longer sleepy like as if there is a fog in my brain.

Billi: Exercise also benefits the mind. When a person is physically active, the body releases what is called endorphins – a substance in the body that act as the body’s natural pain reliever. When endorphins are released, a person may experience a rush of happiness. Many people enjoy this feeling and look forward to it the natural high they get from keeping physically active (Billi’s voice explaining all this with animated visuals).

Appu: You are right Billi. I should make this a part of my daily routine. Now can we go home? I feel I need to rest.

Billi: While physical activity and exercise can make people feel more alert, they also allow people to feel calmer and sleep better.

Scene 3 – Back in Appu’s house.

(Appu and Billi walk with a bounce in their step back to home. Appu is tired but is feeling good and as soon as he sees his bed, takes off his shoes, changes into comfy home clothes and flops on the bed. He falls asleep in minutes. Sometime later, he wakes up and yawns.)

Appu: Was that all a dream? He looks around. He can see his muddy shoes and the shirt he wore to the park has grass and mud stains on it.

Billi who is sleeping near Appu’s bed stirs and looks at Appu.

Appu: Thank you Billi for making the whole exercise experience very enjoyable. I feel great and I promise to exercise everyday, now that I know about its benefits.

Billi: Woof!

Happy is the man (in this case, woman) who has acquired the love of walking for its own sake! - W.J. Holland

I did it! I walked all the way from Indiranagar to Jayanagar shopping complex, which is about 14 Kms. I did this on September 12th, my birthday, reached there with sore feet and thoroughly exhausted and I loved every minute of it.

Regular walkers may pooh-pooh the effort and say it isn’t much, but for someone whose only exercise for years involved just pushing my luck, this felt quite liberating. I must say that the walk lasted for about four hours and I can’t really explain what happened in between, but I felt like a different person at the end of the day. Here is my top five lessons learnt that day:

5) To let go of my regular purse. Now, I am used to carrying a mini home in my bag which has everything from common stuff (money) to the not-so-common (like magnets and no, don’t ask me why). It usually weighs a couple of kilos. Walking that far meant carrying a little excuse of a bag slung across my shoulder. Boy! Did I feel like a part of me has been amputated.

4) To not give in to temptation to stop, come what may and especially when auto drivers were falling over themselves every 10 minutes or so, willing to take me wherever I want. WHERE THE HELL ARE THEY WHEN THEY ARE NEEDED THE MOST?

3) To finally understand what it means when people say the last lap is the toughest in a race. I was sooo tempted to take an auto from 3rd block to 4th block which is like, a blink away. Looking back, its quite a strange feeling that I made it so far, yet found it a struggle to walk about five more minutes.

2) To find out that food tastes so much nicer after a long, long, long, long, walk. I have been eating chaat in Jayanagar complex for years, that day it tasted so much more dee-li-cious.

1) To put your finger on what is the one thing that makes the walk really good…. Some may say good company to walk with, some may say good shoes, some may say to have something to munch along, some may say the path that you take, some may say wear comfortable clothing but in my opinion, its great weather that keeps you going. If the weather had played spoilsport, too hot or if it was raining, I probably wouldn’t have enjoyed it all that much

That day, the weather was gloriously perfect. I mean it when I say, I couldn’t have asked for a better birthday gift!!:)

Radha- Complete the Story.

I was given this assignment when I was doing a course in creative writing. After reading it, you may want to end it differently. Think about it.

Write the opening lines of a story on a topic of your choice. Then write broadly the story line in a few sentences. Thereafter, suggest two possible endings to the story.


Opening lines:

The shrill sound seems to pierce and shatter through the peace and quiet of the morning. Radha woke up with a start. It was her bedside alarm clock giving out a piercing sound. It was still dawn and the sun streamed into her bedroom. Radha shut off the alarm and looked around her room with pleasure. Mama had done it exactly they way she wanted it, her favorite color pink with Barbie doll posters. It looked bright and sunny and cheerful as she felt. She threw off the blanket, went to the bathroom and splashed water on her face. She could hear noises downstairs. Her parents were up already and seemed to be having a conversation. Radha who was never an early riser, decided to join them for breakfast. As she goes down the stairs, her bare feet hardly making any noise. She catches her name, Radha mentioned in the conversation. “Maybe they are planning on a surprise” Radha thought. It was her birthday and she was going to be 10 years that day. Curious, Radha eavesdrops on the conversation. Her parents unaware that they are being listened to, continue their conversation. Radha listens in and freezes, shell shocked about what she heard. In a daze… Radha slowly retraces her steps back to her room as quietly as she had come down the stairs…

Broad outline of the story:

Eavesdropping on the conversation, Radha learns from her parents that she is adopted. They had decided to tell her very soon, on her 10th birthday which was the following week. Shell shocked by what she overheard, Radha rushes back to her room, packs whatever she can in a bag and manages to get out of the house. She wanders aimlessly and finds herself at the railway station, her thoughts in a jumble and her feelings and emotional roller coaster. Starved and tired, she befriends some curious urchins on the railway platform who are curious about her. Their leader sathish all of 14 years of age and too wise for his age, takes her with him and the other urchins to a makeshift shack a little off the railway track. She joins the children and soon learns their ways of life. Most do not have parents and once who did abandoned them when they were little. She hears horror stories of alcoholic parents who beat the kids and one boy whose parents even tried to sell him. Radha misses the luxuries of home and her parents, but the feelings of anger and betrayal of having hid the fact that she was adopted was too much for her to bear. She does bitterly wonder what her adoptive parents had wanted to do with her ultimately. She used to watch sathish and others operating from a distance though and this was a routine until one day….

ENDING # 1: Until one day..Radha accompanies the children to the railway platform. Her eyes taking in everyone and everything around her. She sees an old man with a little boy presumably his grandson and a lump forms in her throat. She sees another woman feeding her child. Then she spots a lady, her gait slow, her back turned to Radha. She seemed to be showing something to passers by. Many just shrugged and moved away from her. The man beside her was also stopping people and asking them something. He too seemed to meet with shrugs and shaking of heads. Radha goes closer and realizes with a start that it is her mother. She stood rooted to the spot. Around the same time, her mother turns and catches a glimpse of her. She is equally transfixed, her face looks lined with worry before letting out a wail of recognition and rushes towards Radha. No words were needed. Just mother and daughter embraced. The days of separation seemed to disappear and it seemed like Radha was never away. Radha goes home with her parents, does learn that she was adopted when she was only five months old. Her parents speak to her at length all about adoption and how much they love her more than life itself. Radha is home.

ENDING # 2: Until one day, she spots a lady, her gait slow, her back turned to Radha. She seemed to be showing something to passers by. Many just shrugged and moved away from her. The man beside her was also stopping people and asking them something. He too seemed to meet with shrugs and shaking of heads. Radha goes closer and realizes with a start that it is her parents. She stands rooted to the spot. Around the same time, her mother turns and catches a glimpse of her. She is equally transfixed, her face looks lined with worry before letting out a wail of recognition and rushes towards Radha. Her words are drowned out by the shrill whistle of an approaching train.

Radha wakes up with a start. It was her bedside alarm clock shrilling away like that of a whistle of a train and shattering the morning peace. For Radha however, it was a sound that was most welcome for but slowly realized that she had dreamt it all.

Readers: Give it a shot and try a different ending!

Daddy Long Legs - Book Review

When was the last time you ever sat down and wrote a letter to someone? I meant the paper and pen kind, not the widely used electronic media.

Read Daddy long legs - the title is misleading and has nothing to do with the particular species of spider found worldwide. It’s a lively story about Judy Abbott and her letters, a quaint love story with a lovely surprise ending.

Meet Jerusha “Judy” Abbott, 17 year old living in the John Grier Home for Orphans. She has done well at the local high school and one of the trustees of the orphanage offers to pay for her to go to college. For Judy, it is her first contact with anyone other than the orphanage and she is thrilled but her benefactor who sponsors her education insists on remaining anonymous. His only payment for funding her education is that she write a letter to him regularly to let him know of her progress. The letters are to be addressed as John Smith and will be sent care of the secretary. She is to expect absolutely no reply from him and the correspondence would be one-sided.

Rather tough, one would think, to write personal letters to someone you have absolutely no knowledge about.


An extract:

Dear Daddy-Long-Legs,

You only wanted to hear from me once a month, didn't you? And I've been peppering you with letters every few days! But I've been so excited about all these new adventures that I MUST talk to somebody; and you're the only one I know. Please excuse my exuberance; I’ll settle pretty soon. If my letters bore you, you can always toss them in the wastebasket. I promise not to write till the middle of November.

Yours most loquaciously,
Judy Abbott.

Thus begins a series of correspondence from young Judy who is rarely at a loss for words. Her letters are a delight to read, right from the way she addresses Mr. John Smith to the way she signs off in each letter. Over the years, the letters continue while Judy deals with her lessons and exams, college life and trips, and makes new friends. She meets a lot of exciting people one Mr. Jervis Pendleton and Jimmy Mcbride, both relatives of her roommates who find Judy’s company thoroughly enjoyable.

In an age where letter writing is a long forgotten art, one could get swept away with the language and style of writing but more so by Judy’s personality which reminds me of a rainbow – a colorful set of emotions. She can be funny, strange, sweet, charming all at once.


Then Judy falls in love.

I’ll leave it up to you to read the book to find out with whom. The build up right up to the end of the book, however, can hardly stop you from reading the last page first to find out who she falls in love with. The book is a reader’s delight and an inspiration for all would be writers.

My Bangalore (Sigh!)

This poem was written during one of the numerous power cuts, by torch light. I am no poetess but this poem has less to do with sense of rhyming and more to do with a need to vent (THE LAST PARA SUMS IT ALL!!) and I am sure a lot of people from Bangalore will wish for all that is written below !!

I wish for a Bangalore
That is bright and green
With its air condition-like weather
As it had once been.

I wish for a Bangalore
Where is mind is without fear and the head held high
Free from pollution and traffic woes
Instead of road rages, howls and sighs.
(With due apologies to Tagore for borrowing a line here)

I wish for a Bangalore
Where water freely flows
And never have to pay through my nose for the tankers
And made easily available in every house.

I wish for a Bangalore
With zero power cuts and 24/7 light
And should there ever be a power outage
The authorities will permanently set it right.

I wish for a Bangalore
Where the government is dependable and solid as rock
Instead of one that is designed
To give us the frequent jolts and rude shocks.

I wish for a Bangalore
Where we never have to play the waiting game
For promises to be fulfilled
Instead, only to abuse and to blame.

But most of all, I wish for a Bangalore
That doesn’t inspire poems like these
At 4.a.m. during a power cut
When I would rather be asleep!!!

Who is she?

This write up won the first prize at the Gitanjali “Special Woman in your life contest” organized by Gitanjali Jewelers this year beating more than 50,000 entries.


Who is she?

Once, when I was researching various professions that exist, I got huge list of them all, but not one listed “mom” as a profession. Then I realized, it was probably because she was all those professions rolled into one some time or the other and more which makes it so hard to define how special she is in a few words or lines. In my life she has played the role of:

Father who I lost a child,
A friend, a philosopher, a guide,
A light bulb changer,
A bottle opener (for those really tough bottles that wouldn’t budge),
A band aid for bruised knees and hurt egos,
Fought court cases alone far better than any lawyer,
A tower of strength against injustice meted out against her as a widow in the society,
A value system builder,
Took crucial decisions like a CEO despite not having an solid educational background,
a counselor, a problem solver from getting rid to imaginary monsters of her kids to getting civil work executed at home,
A HR manager for managing to keep good human relations despite all odds,
A sales and marketing manager when she had to persuade her kids to follow the right path,
Administration manager to run the house,
Technical and operations manager when there were glitches that comes with maintenance of a house,
A finance and accounts manager and
A home maker and chef, rolled into one,
Logistics and procurement manager from buying to using resources to make ends meet,
A teacher, a psychologist, an advisor, an actor and story teller to help forget the bad times and to eat the veggies,
A hope builder,
An auditor who looked at our mistakes and corrected them till we almost got ISO certificated for it,
A barber (for cutting my hair as a kid),
An analyst,
Home health aide,
Pest control worker (for driving away the cockroaches and lizards that used to make me scream in fright),
Probational officer for the times we overstepped the limits,
A detective who had eyes at the back of her head and knew exactly what the kids were up to,
To an all round nurse and doctor who stayed up, healed, nourished and held our hands through illnesses and more!! In short – SHE IS MOM!

Despite the generation gap, the fights and the complexities that go into every relationship, my mom is not just special in my life. She is my life.