Tuesday, June 19, 2012

Thoo!







I love to eat. When I crave for that something specific, nothing, not wild horses, would keep me from getting it. I am known to wake up at 2 a.m. to eat ice cream in the dark, go out when sick with fever satisfy an urge to eat a potato bun at the bakery – in short, I won’t rest till I had my fill. A female version of Jughead if there ever was one

Usually I have very few deterrents between food and me but recently I found one that put me off what I was craving for, before you could say the word Pani-puri!

I woke up one morning with visions of spicy chaat at a place in Jayanagar in Bangalore. I stay 14 kms away and a plate costs just about ten rupees. Did that stop me from getting what I want? Nope! If it is chaat I want, it is chaat I’ll get (with some shopping thrown in AFTER eating first).

So there I was in an auto, almost wiping the drool off my face, putting up with the long distance, traffic jam, just for a plate of spicy chaat when I lost my appetite half way through the journey real quick!

The reason? Aaaaack thoooo!!

Between my place till the time I reached my destination 14 kms away, I lost count of how many times the auto driver spat out of the auto. Huge globs of shiny phlegm, on and on it went.

Past experiences of questioning the auto drivers as to why they spit ended up with them justifying their act to the point that would put any argument to rest – ranging from “what’s wrong?” to “I feel like it, I’ll do it.” So this time I just kept quiet.

Slowly the visions of savoring spicy chaat shifted, the tummy stopped rumbling, and rather than wipe off the drool, I found it difficult to wipe the disgusted expression off my face.

There was a rule in the paper by the authorities that people who spit will be fined but I can bet the category of people who do spit have never read a paper in their lives.
My feelings about the rule? Thoo!

Here’s the serenity prayer with a twist to all the people who spit in my city

God, Grant me the Serenity to accept the things I can not change,
the courage to change the things I can,
and the wisdom to hide the dead bodies of those people I had to kill
Because they pissed me off with their spitting.